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A film review by Craig J. Koban January 25, 2012 |
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UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING
Kate Beckinsale: Selene
/ Stephen Rea: Dr. Jacob Lane / Michael Elay: Detective
Sebastian / Eve: India Eisley |
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UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING - the fourth film in the werewolf versus vampire horror series – is so mercilessly dead on arrival that feelings of depression swept over me within just a few scant minutes of watching it. The film will most likely be considered
required viewing for
devotees of the franchise, but as for the rest of us non-UNDERWORLD
fundamentalists, AWAKENING is a deafening exercise in testing our
collective patience. Very few film
franchises have made me care so little about its events, characters, and
themes as the UNDERWORLD quadrilogy, and AWAKENING all but cements this
assertion; it’s one of the most crude, bombastic, puerile,
perfunctory, and wholeheartedly unnecessary sequels I have ever seen. The
film’s sheer incompetence at even modestly involving me is matched only
by its festering soullessness. I was frankly surprised by the popularity
of the original 2003 installment, which spilled over into more
unmemorable sequels in 2006’s EVOLUTION
and 2009’s RISE OF THE
LYCANS (which, to be fair, was a prequel).
Even though the films have never really stayed with me, what I do
remember from all of them was that they had an aesthetic style that
was so repulsively and redundantly dark, dreary and sullen that I wanted
to cleanse the screen with Lysol after viewing them. The
producers of AWAKENING have made the categorical blunder of continuing the
series’ morosely colorless visual palette with 3D augmentation, which we all know has
the negative side effect of washing out even the brightest of screen
images at the best of times. Watching
the first three UNDERWORLD pictures I strained to make sense of what was
happening in the midst of all of its impenetrably murky cinematography;
the addition of 3D all but makes this new film unendurable.
There are instances where you just can’t make any coherent sense
of what’s happening within the frame. It’s
one thing for a film to gorge on mindlessly stylized action sequences of
grotesque and pornographic levels of carnage within dimly illuminated shots, but
the even murkier multi-dimensional visuals here makes AWAKENING
rancorously uninviting as a film experience; this is the poster film on how
not to use the technology. As for
the film’s story itself? AWAKENING continues the film’s mythology of a centuries-old
battle between werewolves (lycans) and vampires (which was mostly detailed
in 2009 prequel film). AWAKENING
begins some six months after the events of EVOLUTION when humanity has
discovered the existence of the un-dead and lycans and the war between
them. Their response to the creatures is predictably fearful and
hostile and mankind begins a systematic hunt and extermination of
all non-human life forms on the planet, which has now made this series a
three-way battle between humans and the two warring beasts.
Twelve
years pass in cryogenic freeze for Selene and Michael, but she manages to
free herself of her frigid prison cell to discover that she and her
beloved were being held and used as guinea pigs at a research facility
headed by Dr. Jacob Lane (Stephen Rea, desperately requiring a pay check to be
in this dreck) that wants to use lycans and vampires to come up with a
serum to end the war altogether. The
seemingly good doctor, though, has more vile plans – and secrets –
which involves him using Selene’s own daughter, an all-powerful hybrid
herself (India Eisley) for his twisted research.
This is the straw that broke the death-dealer’s back, as Selene
finds a way to escape the facility (with daughter in hand) to seek out the
remaining vampires in existence and plan a daring counter-attack.
She
does so while, of course, dressed in unendingly form fitting leather to
make her appear as if she just stepped off the pages of a S&M magazine
spread. Beckinsale
was wise to avoid appearing in the third UNDERWORLD picture (which easily
made my list of the Worst Films of 2009), but her willingness to return
in this fourth entry strikes me as puzzling (unless you evidently equate a
hefty payday for the actress). My
central complaint about the first two UNDERWORLD entries was that Beckinsale’s porcelain beauty almost worked against her character:
she’s almost too beautiful to taken seriously as a feral and deeply
hostile kick-ass action heroine. She
is able to posture and grimace as if her character has edge, but she never
really pulls it off convincingly. Beckinsale
always looks fetching in her UNDERWORLD attire, but beyond that her
character is a poser and nothing more than a male masturbatory fantasy; in
essence, a Maxim Magazine-esque sex kitten dressed in erotically charged
clothing and slicing and dicing through multiple male adversaries.
What AWAKENING cements is that Selene’s only real defining
character trait is that she is a sultry looking movie prop…and that’s about
it. Perhaps
what’s missing here is some much needed over-the-top camp value that
actors like Bill Nighy and Michael Sheen brought to the other films.
AWAKENING does have another Brit show up in fangs and pale makeup, Charles
Dance, as a substitute, but he never appears to have any self-deprecating
pleasure with the role. Neither
does Stephen Rea, who looks positively morose throughout the film.
It’s sad to see accomplished actors like Dance and, in
particular, Rea utter cookie-cutter lines of expository-heavy dialogue
that reeks of flavorless banality. Les
Wiseman, who directed UNDERWORLD I and II, took a back seat this go around
and served as producer and co-writer, leaving directorial duties to the
Swedish tandem of Bjorn Stein and Mans Marlind, who have an alarming lack
of command over helming the action in AWAKENING.
They bring little in the sense of editorial cohesion or a sense of
unique style to the film and nearly all the action sequences are handled
with a compassionless detachment from the material.
The frequent battles between humans, werewolves, and lycans are
unrelenting splatergoriums of grotesque carnage (this is the most violent
film of
the entire series), but the film’s unnerving ballet of blood-spewing and
viscera-leaking overkill is more nihilistically numbing than exciting.
Beyond that, there is not one moment in the film that generates a
tangible scare, which is hard, I guess, in this film’s swamp-like visual
stew of wretched 3D artifice and hideously phony-looking CGI-monsters. UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING is an ugly and pointless film, one that neither significantly contributes to the already shaky narrative foundations of the original films. Its existence is owed to that of quick cash grab opportunity to take a well-known series and release a new sequel in 3D to collect some high-surcharged box office money. As far as valueless movie products go, AWAKENING is as bankrupted as they get. The ultimate sin, though, is that this film sets up another future entry in the series. How
sad. How. Very.
Sad. |
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